In my family, I am a father, a husband, a grandfather, a brother, a son
and an uncle. If I choose to cut lawns for a living, the functional
description of my job is 'lawn cutter' but my relational description
within my family doesn’t change, no matter what my job is. I will never
be a lawn cutter to my kids. I will always relate to them as their
father.
When they were little, my role was different than it is
now that they have become adults. As they grew up, the dynamics of our
relationship matured and friendship became more prevalent. Yet even in
the maturing of our relationship, I am still their father and they are
still my kids.
In the natural, my children may be dental
hygienists, marketing directors, and sales coordinators by profession,
but to me, they are and will always be first and foremost my beloved
little ones. They may change careers, which is neither here nor there,
because our relationship will never change.
However, if healthy
family love does not overshadow our functional descriptors, then we will
become more mechanical in the way that we relate to each other. If
heart intimacy is not present, we will look to find another way in which
we try to relate to each other.
It is ludicrous to think that I
could possibly relate to my mother as a 'lawn cutter'. I may cut lawns
for a living, but to my mom, I will always be her son. The same goes
for me being a husband to my wife, a father to my kids, a grandfather
to my grand kids, a brother to my brother and an uncle to my nephews and
nieces.
Yet in the Christian life, we seem to place a higher
priority on our functional descriptors than our relational ones. We see
ourselves as disciples, servants, workers, pastors, apostles, prophets
rather than sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, mothers and
fathers.
We may even confuse our personal identity to God as His
beloved kids with our corporate identity as being a small part of the
Bride of Christ or a soldier in God’s army. I think that is why we find
it so easy to part ways in church life when we disagree. The thing is,
families don’t have that same option. Whether we agree or not, my
brother is my brother for life.
If we don’t relate to each other
in church life through a family model, there is a good chance that we
may see some form of abuse of spiritual authority at one point or
another. Jesus addressed this issue with His disciples when He reminded
them in Matthew 23:8 that they were to treat each other as equals when
He said… “Don’t let anyone call you ‘Rabbi,’ for you have only one
teacher, and all of you are equal as brothers and sisters. (NLT)
While
Jesus also told His disciples that they were not to take the place of
authority reserved only for the Father in people’s lives (Matthew
23:8), it only stands to reason that the more we become like the Son
who is exactly like the Father, the more we will begin to exude the
same kind of family love to others. As Jesus said in John 15:9... Even
as the Father has loved me, I also have loved you. Remain in my love.
(WEB)
It appears that Paul saw himself more as a father than an
apostle in the way that he related to the church plants that he was
connected to. In 1 Corinthians 4:14-17, Paul describes the Corinthians
as his ‘dear children’ and Timothy as his beloved son. And in verse 15,
he writes... Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do
not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through
the gospel. (NIV)
We also read a further unpacking of Paul’s
heart in 1 Thessalonians 2:7 when he writes… But we were gentle among
you, like a nursing mother cherishes her own children. (WEB) And in 1
Timothy 5:1-2, Paul encourages Timothy to relate in a family model
rather than an organizational one.
1 Timothy 5:1-2 ...Do not
rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father.
Treat younger men as brothers, 2 older women as mothers, and younger
women as sisters, with absolute purity. (NIV)
Family love is
what the Christian life is supposed to be all about. At the very core
of the Godhead is a Father and a Son united in Spirit, bonded together
by their complete and absolute love and devotion for one another. And
the good news of the gospel is that we have been invited into the very
center of their family love by virtue of our union with Jesus (John
17:23).
In the Old Testament, God was described by over 300
names. In the New Testament, Jesus revealed the summation of all His
names by calling God, His Father. Creator is a functional descriptor of
what God does, but Father is who He is. There is only one way in which
we can relate to God as Father… and that is as His son or daughter. If
earthly fathers don’t relate to their children at a heart level
through their functional roles, I can't imagine God does either.
I
believe that God loves it when we call Him our Abba! (Romans 8:15;
Galatians 4:6) Though we may wear many different hats in every day
life, He always sees us through the lens of being our Papa (Ephesians
5:1). He chose us before the foundation of the world to be adopted into
His family (Ephesians 1:3-6). He was delighted to make His only
begotten Son the Firstborn among many brothers and sisters (Romans
8:29) and He has made good on His promise to become a real Father to us
(2 Corinthians 6:18).
While Jesus Christ is our Lord, Savior,
King and our all in all, in a family context, He is also our big
brother (Hebrews 2:11-12) Because of His great love for His Father,
Jesus became the way (John 14:6) for us to be fully reconciled to His
Father (2 Corinthians 5:18-19).
In John 8:35, Jesus declared the
heart of family love when He said… Now a slave has no permanent place
in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. (NIV) And in His first
post resurrection message to His 'brothers', Jesus summarized the very
purpose of salvation when He said... I am returning to my God and your
God, to my Father and your Father! (John 20:17)
While our
conversion from darkness to light can be described in many ways, at the
very heart of our salvation is a homecoming to our Father and a new
birth into His wonderful family. Through the cross, Jesus became the
way to bring many children to glory (Hebrews 2:10) and that glory was
His Father's love (John 17:24).
In Luke 15, we read about a
father who lost both of his sons and all he wanted was for them to come
home. Jesus spoke about the home that we are all looking for in John
14:1-3 when He said… 1 “Don’t let your heart be troubled. Believe in
God. Believe also in me. 2 In my Father’s house are many homes. If it
weren’t so, I would have told you. I am going to prepare a place for
you. 3 If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and
will receive you to myself; that where I am, you may be there also.
(NIV)
At the very core of the gospel message is a family love
that brings us home to where we belong. When Jesus took upon Himself
the cloak of humanity, He showed us what His Father was really like and
He dismantled every misconception that religion and poor fathering had
constructed of what God was like. His death, burial and resurrection
paved the way for us to be born into the most amazing family in the
universe!
My prayer is that we would all see the Kingdom of God
through the lens of family love. We are not worker bees toiling in our
Master's field, but sons and daughters of the Kingdom. I pray that the
family love of God would set our hearts at rest so that we would know
that our place in our Father’s family is safe and secure forever.
I
pray that our functional identity would take its rightful place in
submission to our true identity as our Abba’s beloved kids (1 John
3:1). May the revelation of God's family love bring healing to every
bit of family dysfunction that we have experienced here on earth. May
every person who has experienced a disconnection because of parental
rejection, receive a homecoming in the arms of a loving Father today
(Psalm 27:10).
And may we all learn to speak the language of
family love to a world full of orphans that don't even know what they
are looking for. May our Father gives us the wisdom to know how to
point people to our Big Brother who is in Himself, the answer to the
foundational longing of the human heart which cries out... Show us the
Father and it will be enough’ (John 14:8)
John 1:11-13 11 He
came to his own, and those who were his own didn’t receive him. 12 But
as many as received him, to them he gave the right to become God’s
children, to those who believe in his name: 13 who were born not of
blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.
(WEB)